In my path of recovery, I have tried to repair many of the damages that I have caused throughout my using life.  Some of these- amends – were accepted with Grace and I am forever grateful.  Some not so much, and I accept their choice with respect.

There are some who have damaged me along the way, and I forgive from a distance. I was told once that I must pursue this,  as I will not have peace without the confrontation of my past.  I disagree.  You see, I am one of those people I damaged along the way – I also owe to myself the right to have amends with me.

I do not wish to remain in nor engage in those worlds now.  I am not the same person I was then; And I respect their rights to self, as I hope they do for me. This is my journey, not theirs, and I do not expect nor wish for them to come forward and ask for my forgiveness – it is not mine to give.

Sometimes, our past wounds are like the sting of the scorpion.  Horribly painful, terrifying to look at – they seem to hide and sneak upon you.  Today, I no longer fear the scorpion, but I respect them deeply.  They live their lives in their worlds, short lives – small worlds.  They too are preyed upon and succumb to creatures more terrible than I; I also understand that they, too, fear.

With their fierce sting and angry pincers, a scorpion must be a lonely creature.  I still give them a wide berth but not from fear.  They are not able to help what they are.  They will sting for that is what they do.  I pity the scorpion today…I hope in the early mornings they will find a warm place to watch for and hear the music of the sunrise.

As always, my hopes are for your hopes and dreams….T